Bound for Rebound

This is something that had been bugging me for months now. I wasn’t really comfortable with the subject but as time goes by, the picture is now getting clearer and I’ve learned to be more resigned about it. 

Further readings told me that there is almost a none existent percentage of success for relationships that started when one or both of the parties involved were still on the rebound stage. That I must disagree, I personally know a couple who had gone through this situation but at the end of the day they fell in love, got married and now happily living with their one child. But it wasn’t easy I should say, it took them a lot of patience and sacrifices before they realized that they were truly meant for each other. Sacrifices specially on the part of the girl. The guy who was then on the rebound stage (the person on a rebound is someone who is still affected by his/her previous relationship, specially if that relationship lasted for a longer time) was a total mess. We were witness on how much he suffered after his failed relationship with this long time gf. That didn’t last long, luckily for the girl, with her patience and persistence she was able to gain her man’s respect and affection. Likewise, the guy was able to regain his self respect and confidence.

Being a rebound girl or guy I guess hurts bigtime (a rebound girl/guy is someone who entered a relationship with a person who is still on a rebound). The most painful blow happens when the person who was then on a rebound has completely healed and decided that his/her rebound girl/guy finally served her/his sole purpose…to help them get over their previous flame.  Thus discarding their partner, ending the relationship and start looking for someone who they think is better than their rebound partner. Someone who perfectly fits their standard (physical, financial, etc)…making their rebound partner a lowly last choice… That story about my friend was a fairy tale. It happens maybe in one over a hundred rebound relationships…That’s how I see things because a relationship that started without honesty and sincerity will never work.

Before entangling yourself into a serious relationship, one must make sure that you yourself is free from your past, otherwise it would be unfair to the other party. Likewise, one must be sure that your partner is also free from his past relationships. A fresh start for both parties. 

What’s puzzling me is how can a person (who just broke up with his long time partner) pursue you with such determination (asking some friend’s help, calls day and night, never leaving your side and becoming your emotional strength during family problems, gaining your family’s trust, etc), with such drama…gaining your sympathy after telling the sad story of his life and making you believe that you were the one who saved him from self distraction, telling that you gave him the second chance to continue with life… (Only an idiot would ever believe those rubbish, after all, it’s all drama, an act well played) and then wham! it’s all over, and the person would act just normally, picking up the pieces and start looking around…you are completely out of the picture, just like that. You were witness to his dark side but still you insist to see only the goodness in him. At some point you even believed him to be the best, in terms of character (never considering his shady past), and in terms of all the goodness that he showed you. Act or not, again this idiot still admits that.  As it turned out, you now realize that you really don’t know that person, and you can no longer separate the truth from mere acts. Does this classify as a rebound? after all the person got over his past with an idiots help….or just some ramblings of a bitter heart? because the person moved on and found someone else while you, an idiot is taking the long process to recover. This idiot is completely at fault, of all that happened, no one’s to blame but this idiot girl alone. 

PS. Do not let yourself be emotionally dependent to your partner, until you get married I guess. That will save you buckets of tears.